I have seen him a few times in the office during two minutes hate. I wasn't sure, but I think he actually looked at me the other day. It's hard to see him when we both work in different departments in the Minitrue.
These feelings inside, they're feelings of rebellion. Feelings I need to keep hidden from the thought police or I'll be vaporized. They're the ones that need to be vaporized. What's so bad about these feelings if there is no way to stop from feeling them. They don't understand my urges to be intimate with others. Don't they ever have these feelings?
I recently injured my arm and purposefully fell upon it while he was walking towards me. In an act to help me up, I secretly slipped him a note with the words "I love you" inscribed. I wish i could see how he reacted to all this? I hope he feels the same way as I do him. He wouldn't betray me, would he? That would be doubleplus bad. Risking my life for love is what it takes to tear this world apart. We need to change everything.
Besides, I've does this more than once.
-Julia
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